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Are You And Your Bestie Vacation Compatible?

Here ye, Here ye!

It’s summertime and we’re all in the throes of vacation planning. We’re wrangling the troops (our best friends, Sorors and gal pals—basically the perfect human concoction) for our next girl’s trip.

Whilst dumping friends into that “Summer 2K19” group chat, it makes perfect sense to think of your tightest friends first.

But hold your horses—slow you your roll—everyone you’re thinking of, might not make for the best mix for your next vacation. You might not all be “vacation compatible.”

It might stand to reason that everyone in your wolfpack is someone you love so that CLEARLY means you can go on vacation with that group…duh.

Actually, no, girl.

Let’s start by breaking down what vacation compatibility means and who might be in your vacation compatibility circle. Here are a few things you can NOT rely on when gathering this group:

The following does NOT make you vacation compatible:

  • Anyone and everyone you’ve called your “friend” in the past 5 years (but maybe have not spoken to or checked-in with during that time)
  • Immediate family members (just primarily based on the fact that you’re family members, and for no other reason)
  • A new person you’re in a relationship with
  • Your best friend (just because they’re your best friend and no other reason)
  • Your Sorors (just because they’re your Sorors—we’re talking to you [Insert Sorority-versary-ers]

With that out of the way…

Your vacation compatibility group is solid when you have a group of friends or acquaintances who are able to successfully coordinate and execute a planned vacation for an extended period of time. You might have the same objective and mission, with similar resources in order to achieve that said mission.

These are a few other rules you might consider (and avoid) in your vacation compatibility group:

        Friends with unaddressed tension

  • Vacation is a time to relax, recharge and release so it’s hard to do this with a friend you might have unresolved issues with, or unaddressed tension. You’re likely not vacation compatible with someone who you have to over-consider your standing with.

        Uncomplimentary roommates

  • Let’s be real, you’re basically a roommate/housemate with these people for the next few days/weeks. So, vacation compatibility is all about being with people who you trust and feel comfortable sharing your space with for a fixed period of time. You have to consider whether or not these people clean after themselves (if cleanliness is your thing), whether they like to cook and you don’t, or whether or not you are the one to always advocating for grocery shopping … either way vacation compatibility is all about being with people who are on the same page with the housing situation

        Financial incompatibility

  • Now let’s be REAL real, vacations are expensive, so you have to pick people who don’t make you feel like your money is being wasted or people you feel aren’t good with managing their money.

        Conflicting exterior relationships

  • Vacation compatibility can be about outside relationships as well. Who’s single? Who’s in a relationship? Who is trying to party? Who is trying to be boo’d up on the phone with their significant other all night?

        Introverts vs. extroverts

  • Who wants to do everything in a group? Who is using this vacation to snag a little alone time?

        And just plain conflicting personality types

  • Who’s is the planner in the group and can’t function unless every hour is planned and who is the go with the flow friend?

        Explorers vs. homebodies

  • Who’s into exploring new things (foods, activities, places) and who is really just trying to find the nearest McDonalds?

 Now, let’s say that after reading this you like you’re not vacation compatible with your bestie, that doesn’t mean you’re not best friends anymore. In fact, it can mean the complete opposite.  Being vacation compatible with someone has little to do with your actual friendship compatibly with that person. Friendship compatibility traits don’t always have to extend to the vacation compatibility ones.

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Discover the transformative power of healing in community in Dr. Joy Harden Bradford’s debut book, Sisterhood Heals. Order your copy now!

Sisterhood heals
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Looking for the UK Edition?
Order here

Discover the transformative power of healing in community in Dr. Joy Harden Bradford’s debut book, Sisterhood Heals. Order your copy now!

Looking for the UK Edition? Order here